When Offense Fails to Materialize

A few weeks ago, I found myself in a brief YouTube comment exchange that could have gone the usual way. Sarcasm was involved. Moral urgency was implied. Lines were being drawn about who should care, how much, and in what tone.

In other words, the conditions for offense were present.

The exchange started under a post by someone else, where a third party expressed strong opinions about how others were responding to the murder of Charlie Kirk. The discussion quickly shifted from the tragedy itself to accusations about loyalty, friendship, and the supposed danger posed by divergent opinions surrounding it.

I replied with sarcasm — not to trivialize the tragedy, but to question the level of alarm being demanded around the surrounding commentary.

That sarcasm was called out as “carrying no weight.”

Fair enough. Sarcasm rarely carries weight when it’s used to question moral scale rather than to signal shared outrage.

What followed, though, was not what usually follows online. There was no escalation, no pile-on, no moral shaming spiral. Instead, after a few back-and-forths, the other commenter realized we were largely in agreement about the point I was actually making. He apologized for misunderstanding me. I acknowledged the limits of nuance in YouTube comments. We wished each other well and moved on.

Only later did I notice something ironic: the person I’d been exchanging comments with had previously posted a sermon titled Overcoming Unforgiveness, Bitterness & Offense. I hadn’t seen it before. I wasn’t responding to it. I didn’t know it existed until after the exchange ended.

The irony isn’t that I somehow lived out a sermon before hearing it. The order matters. What’s interesting is that an unplanned, unscripted interaction — one that included sarcasm and disagreement — ended up testing those themes in real time.

What struck me wasn’t that offense never appeared but that it wasn’t taken, and that made understanding possible.

That’s worth pausing over, because offense is often treated as inevitable. Worse, it’s treated as evidence of seriousness or moral engagement. If you’re not offended, the assumption goes, you must not care enough.

But that logic doesn’t hold.

In this case, disagreement didn’t produce bitterness. Sarcasm didn’t prevent clarity. Refusing to perform outrage didn’t signal indifference. The moment it was clear neither of us needed the other to feel correctly, the conversation relaxed and resolved itself— something that feels more rare then it should.

This runs counter to much of what passes for moral discourse today, especially online. We are trained to believe that love looks like heightened urgency, that faith looks like visible outrage, and that seriousness requires a particular emotional posture. Anyone who refuses that posture is treated as suspect.

I don’t think sarcasm is necessarily virtuous. I also don’t think seriousness is always sincere. What I’m increasingly convinced of is that offense is a poor substitute for discernment — and rarely a faithful expression of care.

Taking offense certainly doesn’t prove one cares about the right things.

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Part 3 —Racism, Intent, and How Christians Judge Meaning

Introduction

This final post continues the breakdown of my exchange with Anthony Wade of @The ScatteredSheep Podcast (TSSP), focusing on the one issue that remained unresolved between us: whether Charlie Kirk’s words were racist — and how Christians reason their way toward, or away from, that judgment.

In Part 1- In the Aftermath, I explained the framework I bring to questions of speech, motive, and labels  — why definitions matter, why intent matters, and why Christians should be careful with moral accusations.  In Theology, Discernment, and the Clash Over Charlie Kirk (Part 2), I traced how that framework collided with Wade’s discernment methodology during our interaction.

This is where the exchange narrowed to the real point of disagreement:

What counts as evidence of racism, and how do Christians judge meaning without collapsing intent, impact, and accusation into a single moral reflex?

Wade held a settled conviction that Kirk’s speech was racist, hateful, and deceptive.  I was not convinced of that conclusion — though, as I stated clearly in Part 1, I could be wrong and would be open to correction if compelling evidence warranted it.  The spark for this conversation was not simply whether Charlie Kirk said something wrong, but how Christians assign meaning, determine guilt, and communicate moral boundaries in public discourse.

Wade did give a clear definition of martyr, which I appreciated.  Yet when I asked him to define racism, he declined — and that refusal exposed the heart of our disagreement. I was asking for clarity of meaning; he believed the meaning was already obvious.

Without shared definitions, Christians end up arguing not only about conclusions but about the very criteria for reaching them.

Questioning intent is not a way of excusing speech or dismissing moral responsibility. It is how we determine whether a moral label accurately describes the speaker rather than merely registering disapproval of the words themselves — especially when claims of harm are asserted but never clearly articulated.

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1. What Wade Believed He Was Identifying

From Wade’s perspective, the matter was straightforward: Charlie Kirk’s statements were racist, the intent was obvious, and Christians have a duty to condemn harmful speech quickly and clearly.

Wade’s core convictions as they emerged in the video and our exchange:

• Racism is a moral category with clear boundaries.

• Kirk’s statements were objectively racist; context cannot alter that.

• Lying about DEI or racial quotas constitutes willful deception.

• Intent does not mitigate harm: impact defines meaning.

• Discernment requires labeling harmful speech without hesitation.

• The Church is in danger because some believers elevate Kirk as a hero.

• “Truth is not malleable” — claims must be judged as fact or lie.

• Christians who hesitate to condemn harmful rhetoric risk enabling it.

How this came across publicly:
Wade communicated from a moral-absolutist stance: when speech causes harm, rebuke must be immediate and un-nuanced.

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2. What I Was Actually Saying (Even When I Didn’t Spell It Out)

My disagreement wasn’t with the existence of sin, or the reality of harmful speech.
It was with the confidence of the accusation and the criteria being used to justify it.

My position, clarified:

• The conflict centered on the meaning of the word racist.

• “Racist” is a term with expanded, shifting, and sometimes inconsistent usage.

• Intent and context matter in interpretation.

• Overconfident labeling creates new forms of injustice.

• I wasn’t defending CK’s rhetoric — I was questioning the standard of evidence.

• If we don’t know someone’s heart, we should not speak as if we do.

• CK acknowledged these were intrusive, sinful thoughts— that complicates motive attribution.

• Celebrations of his murder, while using the same quotes to justify it, demonstrated a deeper moral distortion than anything in these particular quotes.

• Two extremes distort truth:

  • some deify CK,

  • others demonize him.

How I hope my stance came across publicly:
I was grounding the conversation in interpretive fairness, not political or tribal loyalty.

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3. Where We Talked Past Each Other

Even when we used the same words — harm, intent, truth, racism — we were not speaking the same conceptual language.

My Intention	How Wade Seemed to Interpret It
“We must scrutinize definitions.”	“You’re minimizing harm.”
“Context helps us interpret meaning.”	“You’re excusing wrongdoing.”
“We should avoid presuming motives.”	“You’re afraid to speak boldly.”
“Both extremes distort truth.”	“You’re equivocating or being political.”

Our reasoning paths didn’t meet because they started from different assumptions about how moral knowledge works.

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4. The Framework Clash Beneath the Disagreement

The conflict was not personal — it was epistemological.
We were applying two legitimate, but incompatible, approaches to moral discernment.

My Framework	Wade’s Framework
Theology shapes rhetoric.	Rhetoric reveals theology.
Interpretation → judgment.	Judgment → interpretation.
Intent + context = meaning.	Impact = meaning.
Language must be clarified.	Language has fixed moral weight.
Case-by-case discernment.	Corruption is contagious; act quickly.
Epistemic humility.	Moral certainty.

Core tension:

• I was trying to understand what was meant.

• Wade was trying to judge what should be allowed.

Both approaches aim at truth — but they prioritize different safeguards.

Resulting perceptions:

• A fair-minded observer might see my approach as consistent, careful, and humanizing.

• Wade likely saw it as risking confusion or moral compromise.

Both views make internal sense.
They simply address different dangers.

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5. What This Reveals About How Christians Judge Accusations

The exchange exposed a recurring problem in how Christians handle public controversy:

• Moral urgency accelerates conclusions.

• Interpretive humility slows them.

Neither wants to betray the truth.

But when urgency operates without humility:

• Oversimplification → false accusation.

And when humility operates without urgency:

• Over complication → moral paralysis.

The argument over Charlie Kirk wasn’t just political.
It exposed deeper fault lines in how Christians understand:

• responsibility

• speech ethics

• motives

• sin

• epistemology

• charity

• and the limits of judgment

Put differently:

We often agree on the destination (truth),
but argue about the map.

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6. A Clear, Quiet Ending 

By the end of our exchange, I tried to put into words what I believed Wade was doing in his videos. I said:

“You (in this video) seem to be coming at this from a kind of ‘protect the Church from bad theology’ perspective in your own sort of way.
I am not sure if you think Kirk’s ideas were more of a threat to the Church or to the people he supposedly hated.”

Wade confirmed that understanding, replying:

“This channel is a discernment ministry.
So yes, it is about trying to protect the church per se.

If the church was not actively deifying him, I would probably never have commented on this other than to say no one deserves to be shot for expressing their opinion.”

We did not resolve our disagreement about Charlie Kirk’s motives, intentions, or meaning.
But we did arrive at clarity about our priorities and our respective aims.

That clarity was its own form of peace.

If more Christian disagreements ended with clarity rather than caricature, we might find that unity does not require uniformity of method — only honesty about the good each person is trying to protect.

Part 2 Theology, Discernment, and the Clash Over Charlie Kirk

Dissecting My Interaction with  @TheScatteredSheep Podcast

1. How the Exchange Even Started

My first encounter with Anthony Wade of @TheScatteredSheepPodcast (TSSP)—a very small discernment ministry focused on exposing theological compromise—came about when one of his videos popped up in my YouTube recommendations. (along with everything else about Charlie Kirk).  He drew me in with a sharp critique of Troy Black’s false prophecy.  (I had only first heard of Troy Black two days before and I was annoyed by his 'prophecy claims'.)

At first the exchange between myself, Wade, and the other commenters on his video was very lighthearted and supportive—mostly jokes about the ridiculousness of Troy’s prophetic claims. Wade was friendly and even appreciative at first, even if some of my humor seemed to confuse him a bit.

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2. Where the Conversation Turned

However, when I tried to point out what I thought Tucker Carlson meant in the memorial speech, a key tension emerged.

• I treated Tucker’s point as a political analogy about silencing speech (a Gamaliel principle).

• Wade treated it as if it were a theological exaltation of Charlie Kirk—directly comparing Charlie’s death to the Crucifixion.

He interpreted Carlson’s analogy (and my reference to Gamaliel in Acts 5:34-38) literally, as if we were comparing Charlie Kirk directly to Jesus or Peter.

In short:

I was exploring an analogy.
He was refuting what he thought was a doctrinal statement.

I saw it as a general premise about killers and motives, with no theological equivalence implied.—someone allegedly disliked what Kirk said and acted violently.  I eventually ventured into a nuanced disagreement about the Kirk assassination motive and how religious vs. political identity should be interpreted, which went beyond the video’s original scope. He wasn’t dismissive, but he didn’t engage deeply with the theological or philosophical layers I tried to raise.

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3. Early Misalignment Points Between Us

• Humor vs. Literalism: Early on he enjoyed the playful banter, but as the discussion grew weightier, my sarcasm and analogies increasingly met with his literal, earnest interpretations, creating a tonal gap.

• Exploratory vs. Declarative: I raised hypothetical and multi-layered questions; he focused on asserting conclusions from public reports.

• Faith vs. Politics: I questioned the relationship between religious and political motives; he consistently emphasized a political reading of Kirk’s identity and actions.

• Epistemic Modesty vs. Certainty: I highlighted ambiguity and limits of inference; he spoke with confidence about the likely motives based on reporting.

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4. Why I Watched the Second Video

A few politically charged comments—such as referring to Charlie Kirk’s hate as an established fact—made me curious about where Wade was actually coming from. That ultimately shaped my engagement with the second video I picked from his channel, titled:

“NAR Dominionism Teaching – How Carnal Narratives Exploit Tragedy for Political Ends.”

In the second video, I stayed focused on extreme political framing and logical consistency. I noticed a disconnect between criticizing Kirk for conflating politics and Christianity while relying solely on political examples to illustrate the point that Kirk shouldn’t be deified.

Across both videos, my lens remained the same:

• analyzing how political and religious claims are presented

• questioning extreme readings

• tracking logical coherence

Why? Because in the first video, I already saw Wade:

• interpreting analogies as literal claims

• stating unproven motives as established fact

• jumping to theological conclusions where I saw a simpler explanation

So in the second video, my focus naturally shifted toward examining:

• whether he was again overstating certainty

• whether he was again mixing political framing with theological claims

• whether he was again reacting to rhetoric more intensely than the rhetoric required

This time, I wasn’t evaluating the topic — I was monitoring the pattern.

At this point, the disagreement was no longer about Charlie Kirk at all — it was about how discernment itself should function.

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⭐ 5.  Key Takeaways from the Exchange with Wade @TheScatteredSheep Podcast

1. Wade's method seemingly undercuts his own Standards for Christians and the Church
Observation:
When someone claims to be doing theological correction, or "Discernment ministry," but uses political material as their primary evidence, they inevitably muddle the message. The form contradicts the content. If Wade wants that to be persuasive, grounding critiques in theological/scriptural argument rather than primarily political examples would be more consistent with that framing.

Why it stood out to me:
This was my first exposure to Wade.  His channel (TSSP) surfaced via algorithm because he was responding to the controversies around Charlie Kirk’s murder. That context amplified the inconsistency: he was reacting to cultural/political events, but critiquing CK for allowing the same kind of entanglement.

Why it matters:
Wade strongly critiques Christians who allow their politics to shape their religion rather than letting theology shape their politics. So in this specific instance, when he critiques CK by using the same politically charged quotes commonly used by CK’s political opponents, his argument becomes less distinct, less theological, and less consistent with his own standards.

Effect:
By using politically charged examples to demonstrate CK’s failings, Wade blurs his own theological framing. His point might still be valid, but the rhetorical method makes his theological critique less clear — and that’s where my “quiet” insight came through.

Lesson:
If a channel presents itself as a discernment ministry, critiques of Christian figures land more consistently and persuasively when they’re grounded in Biblical/theological reasoning rather than political evidence.

Result of the Exchange:

✅ I believe my point did come through subtly in my original exchange with Wade.
✅ I hinted at it without accusing him.
✅ He did not reject my final framing, but stated why he spoke about Charlie Kirk in the first place: "The Church is actively deifying CK."

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2. Wade interprets divergence as off-topic and collapses disagreement into NAR influence
Observation:
In the video itself Wade talks about his talk with a friend and claims he had been corrupted by NAR influence without knowing it. During the exchange with me, Wade steered the conversation back to his intended focus — protecting the Church from theological error. He often treated any attempts to nuance or question his framing as a digression. Points I raised about context, political framing, or extremes in reactions to CK were often interpreted as evidence of NAR (New Apostolic Reformation) influence rather than addressed directly.

Lesson:
A speaker who frames deviations as “off-topic” and collapses nuanced disagreements into a broad category like NAR influence can subtly control the conversation and limit scrutiny of their own logic. Recognizing this dynamic allows a respondent to maintain clarity in their reasoning without being pulled into the imposed framing.

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3. Using politically loaded examples guarantees political interpretation — even if the speaker insists otherwise
Observation:
Throughout the exchange, Wade relied on politically charged examples to illustrate CK’s failings, such as CK’s statements about DEI initiatives, racial quotas, and pilots. These examples naturally provoke strong emotional reactions from observers, making it difficult to isolate the theological critique from the political outrage.

If Wade truly wanted a message about the church, he could have stuck with:

• Biblical examples — such as warning against idolatry, misplacing loyalty, or valuing reputation over character.

• Historical Christian distortions — pointing to past cases where political entanglement led the Church astray.

• Pastoral warnings — discussing how leaders should model discernment rather than focus on cultural battles.

• Intra-church patterns of hero-worship — highlighting where church figures were elevated for political rather than theological reasons.

Type of discussion that highlighted the disconnect:
I was trying to discuss CK’s comments in context, emphasizing intention, societal reaction, and moral nuance. Wade repeatedly pivoted back to examples of political controversies, effectively interpreting my questions about context and nuance as deviations or evidence of corruption.

Lesson:
Using politically charged material as primary evidence for theological correction will inevitably trigger defensive reactions. A clearer distinction between theological critique and political commentary would help maintain focus on the stated mission.

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4. Wade inadvertently reproduced the dynamic he condemns
Observation:
He implied CK’s followers “deify” him when they defend him or nuance his comments. But:

• Wade used highly charged political material → which predictably provoked defensive reactions → which he then would likely interpret as “deification.”

• Wade’s critique of CK depends on imputing CK’s intent while dismissing how people might read CK’s intent.

  • “He says these things because his politics inform his faith.”

  • “He knew he was lying when he said that.”

  • “He was either racist or pandering to his audience who are largely racists.”

• Wade rejects the idea that his own highly political framing might shape how people interpret his motives.

Lesson:
If you create the conditions that produce the behavior you condemn, that’s not insight — that’s circular logic. If intent matters for moral evaluation, it matters for everyone, not just the person being criticized.

Result of the Exchange:
I believe my responses indirectly highlighted that asymmetry.

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5. A more consistent form of critique was available to him — and he didn’t take it
Observation:
Had Wade framed the issue Biblically:

• Idolatry

• Misplaced loyalty

• Prophetic correction

• Discernment

• Speech ethics

• Shepherding responsibilities

…then his point would have been stronger, more consistent, and unassailable on the grounds I pointed out.

Lesson:
If your stated aim is theological correction, choose theological tools — not political ones. This aligns tightly with my sense of “he could have said this better and without triggering political interpretations.”

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6. My approach highlighted the asymmetry without escalating
Observation:
Where Wade foregrounded political examples and imposed broad interpretive categories (e.g., NAR influence) to frame CK’s actions, I focused on context, nuance, and intent — applying interpretive generosity, avoiding absolutes, and keeping the discussion grounded in logic rather than loaded rhetoric.

Lesson:
A careful, context-aware approach can reveal asymmetries in someone else’s critique, highlighting where methodology undercuts stated principles, without escalating conflict. Choosing interpretive clarity over rhetorical provocation allows the underlying argument — or its inconsistencies — to surface naturally.

Effect:
This method ensured that even subtle observations about framing, intent, and double standards landed without triggering defensiveness, allowing the conversation to end with mutual acknowledgment rather than escalation.

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7. MY message conveyed all of this — quietly, without sounding combative
Observation:
My actual replies had a tone of:

• “I understand your stated purpose…”

• “…but I’m not sure your method achieved it.”

• “Because the examples you chose came from a different rhetorical world.”

Result of the Exchange:
I did communicate the hypocrisy/contradiction — but in a way that allowed Wade to remain non-defensive. That’s why he responded well in the end.

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⭐ 6. Navigating the Underlying Discernment Issue

When one person approaches an issue through an impact-first moral framework and the other approaches it through an interpretation-first framework (intent + context + linguistic precision) — discussions risk semantic drift and unproductive conflict. Understanding why this drift happens matters: different frameworks answer different epistemic questions: One asks, “What harm did this cause?” The other asks, “What did the speaker mean, and how can we know?” Without recognizing that difference, even good-faith discussions can slide into confusion.

Strategically, framing subtle critiques through context, intent, and interpretive generosity allows a respondent to reveal inconsistencies and methodological asymmetries without provoking defensiveness. In contrast, relying on overtly political or emotionally charged examples will predictably trigger resistance and obscure the core argument.

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This entire exchange raised an unavoidable question: if Wade was so confident that Charlie Kirk’s statements were racist or pandering to racists, do we actually have enough evidence to make that claim? That question deserves its own treatment. The next post addresses it directly.

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Postscript / Addendum

After publishing this post, I came across a theological critique of Charlie Kirk that I had not seen at the time of my exchange with Anthony Wade.  It illustrates the kind of approach I was gesturing toward above—one rooted primarily in biblical and theological categories rather than political.  While Wade raised overlapping concerns—including associations and influences—this video offers an example of a critique in which Charlie Kirk’s theological claims and associations are more clearly foregrounded, rather than being interwoven with and at times overshadowed by politically charged arguments about racism or hate.

In my exchange with Wade — and throughout these posts — I was explicit about what I did and did not know. I did not claim familiarity with Charlie Kirk’s specific theological positions, church affiliations, or doctrinal commitments.  My critique therefore centered on method: the way politically charged material was used to support what was presented as a theological concern. 

This link is offered for those wanting further theological evaluation.

[Charlie Kirk & TPUSA are Deceiving Millions-Real Talk with Jordan Riley]

In the Aftermath: Sorting Out the Labels Before Sorting Out the Man — Principles Before Opinions

"Charlie Kirk" by Gage Skidmore, is licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0

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In the Aftermath of a Most Troubled Event:
Wherein I Consider the Noise and Tumult Raised Concerning One Charlie Kirk,
and Examine the Many Rash Accusations Employed Without Measure in Our Present Age,
Together with the Curious Celebrations Both to Denigrate and to Honor;
With Some Reflections on How a Christian Ought to Discern Speech, Motives, and the Labels Men Cast Upon One Another

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Charlie Kirk was a polarizing political influencer killed in Orem UT Sept 10 2025. In the immediate aftermath there was all sorts of controversy in the YouTube algorithm regarding what actually happened.  Many expressed concerns that certain aspects did not seem to make sense between what they witnessed happen on live stream and the story we all have been told afterwards. Like other high profile assassinations, theories of conspiracies abound, and will likely continue to abound. According to the official story and Indictment one man acted alone of course, and he allegedly admitted to his parents and lover that he murdered Charlie Kirk because he believed Charlie spread too much hate.

There were also hundreds if not thousands of people making posts online, either blatantly celebrating, because they too believed Charlie Kirk to be a hateful or racist person, or at the very least, implying he got what he deserved for the kind of things he said.  The most common example of his racism, that I saw, was what he said about worrying black pilots might not be qualified because of a United Airlines policy statement, requiring 50 percent of the training class be "women or people of color".

On the other hand Charlie Kirk was given a huge memorial with thousands in attendance. Part worship service part Republican political rally. He was given the medal of Freedom by President Donald J. Trump. DJT named Kirk's Birthday as a National Day of Remembrance. Some that don't want to celebrate Charlie Kirk, changed it to George Floyd Remembrance day, because strangely these two high profile figures shared the same birthday. Charlie Kirk obviously an influential person on the American political right, and George Floyd, because of the incident surrounding his death, became a icon for the left and movements such as "Black Lives Matter".
 

By some Charlie Kirk is considered a martyr. The question about whether he was a martyr or not depends on how one defines the term martyr *(and how one defines beliefs and bravery). In modern American uses of the term, martyr basically signifies anyone killed or injured that are also considered brave or heroic for sticking to their beliefs or cause despite the obvious danger. Assuming he believed what he was saying and would say these things despite the danger, perhaps the broad definition applies if the bulk of what he was saying was noble. 
The meaning of the word martyr in Christianity, since the end of the first century meant someone who willingly suffers even to the point of death rather then renouncing their faith in Jesus Christ. The word, martyr, comes from the Greek (martus) meaning 'a witness.' Originally it just carried the sense of someone willing to testify to something they have first hand knowledge of.  In this strictly Christian sense, it doesn't appear that Charlie was directly hated or killed for what he said about Jesus Christ but what he said or believed about other things.  Although his Christian beliefs may have informed his other beliefs, or his other beliefs may have informed his Christian beliefs, either way it doesn't necessarily mean he was directly killed for his Christian beliefs.

Others like ShoeOnHead just saw Charlie Kirk as a guy that said stuff, and the fact that he was killed and people celebrated really Sucks. ShoeOnHead disagreed with things he said but believed the extreme accusations are unwarranted.  This is also my basic view as well.   Of course it should also go without saying but obviously it doesn't, the extreme action of murder for disagreeing with someone is tragic!

I didn't know that much about Charlie Kirk before his murder. I caught a few of his video clips of discussions with college students, a year ago, such as this one with Vivek Ramaswamy or the one on Jubilee I didn't know anything about his organization or various_non profits he started. I knew he supported Trump and was critical of left wing policies. I didn't know how often he talked about his faith, nor anything about his specific theological positions within Christianity. I also didn't know anything about the specific controversies or backlash he had received for things that he had said. Except to the point I have seen "everyone and their mother" called names like racist (or more recently Nazi or fascist) for seemingly anything and everything. I've been amazed, confounded, and written about this for years. This is why I could totally relate when ShoeOnHead shared the list she has been keeping over the past couple years about all the things she has been called conceptually similar names for (fascist, Nazi, reactionary)

I admit I have sadly become apathetic when people call others racist. Do to extreme over use and exaggerations, I feel like I used to care but now it feels like the boy who cried wolf scenario. (Aesop fable)-Boy Who Cried Wolf)  Charlie Kirk could have been hateful or racist or just pandering to his base that are mostly racist... It could be, but I'm not buying it! Many believe certain words are racist in and of themselves and no context could ever excuse them.  I agree that context might not excuse, although it might shed valuable light into whether or not a person was being deliberately hateful or a provocateur.  In general I think it is unwise to 'quote mine' in order to make sweeping claims about another persons character. This is especially true if one claims to be a Christian. I think it does matter what someone actually meant more then what they actually said. It could be they said a bad or incorrect thing in a bad way.  It doesn't make them hateful automatically.

In a way Charlie himself admitted that the kind of thoughts he would have regarding black pilots were dirty, sinful thoughts.  
On Megyn Kelly he explained the comment in the following way:

I want to just reiterate the essence of that clip that was missed by almost everybody Jordan Peterson to his credit really picked up on it which is what I was trying to be you know very vulnerable at the audience is that DEI invites unwholesome thinking and I said I don't and I was saying in the clip that's not who I am that's not what I believe but what it does is it makes us worse version of ourselves Megan that's the whole point of what I was saying is that I now look at everything through a hyper racialized diversity quota lens because of their massive insistence to try to hit these ridiculous racial hiring quotas of course I believe anybody of any skin color can become a qualified pilot that is never been my contention I mean it's silly it's bigoted to think otherwise... I just I want to make sure this is clear because the the the the deeper Point even got cut off in that clip and that's fine is that DEI creates like bad people and that's we walk around asking questions that we otherwise wouldn't ask and I happen to say the quiet part out loud because I don't like thinking that way I feel dirty I feel like sinful I feel that I'm now asking questions I wouldn't otherwise ask but they've invited this entire conversation and by the way I just want to make this clear because then some people say but Charlie they're totally qualified hold on every analysis that we have of similar quota based affirmative action programs always results in the lowering of Standards

The "bad people" he spoke about was himself in this scenario.  I don't know if his claim is correct regarding the results of these policies. I would need way more evidence such a policy is good for me to believe what he said was evil. I don't think it is intellectually honest to insist his words were so terrible and should be condemned totally while also maintaining context doesn't matter. I do know people such as Thomas Sowell has been saying the same thing for years before Charlie Kirk was born.  Charlie Kirk greatly respected Sowell and used and recommended his work.   Clearly, if black people can share the same opinion on these types of policies, there could be more to it then someone simply being hateful or racist.  I heard there once was a dream about people being judged by "the content of Character" not the "color of skin". This seems difficult if not impossible to achieve if there are mandatory skin color requirements. I don't think Charlie Kirk was a Nazi and I don't think he was actually hateful but as with anything I could be wrong-

In a follow-up post I will give a break down of my interaction with a "discernment ministry" and our clash over Charlie Kirk.

When “Identity” Became Synonymous With “Trans”:

  A Misreading That Reveals a Bigger Linguistic (and Cultural) Shift 

While watching a YouTube critique of a message purported to be directly from God about who killed Charlie Kirk, it caught my attention immediately when the reviewer automatically interpreted the word identity in the original speaker’s sentence as referring only to trans‑identity. The original line was simply,

“I love him and those like him who are going through similar struggles with their identity.”

Clearly not the main point of the critique, and  although I agree with the overall criticism or "take-down" of the original video’s claims, the reviewer was wrong to assume that identity automatically equals trans. I admit the possibility that Troy, in his fake prophecy regarding who killed Charlie Kirk, was probably conflating the accused and his alleged trans lover, but he didn't claim the killer was trans.  Troy said the killer struggled with his identity. This is known as semantic narrowing, and in this particular case is indicative of a culture war that has been brewing for the past fifteen years or so.  

There are a myriad of ways one could struggle with identity, that doesn't mean trans. If the official story is true, the shooter was potentially a gay kid in Mormon Utah. Identity refers to the overall sense of self, not specifically gender identity.  Reports say the accused is dating a trans furry woman in Utah! His roommate is supposedly his lover, in other words. They could be married for all I know. 
Is the accused killer gay or is he straight? Is his lover a boy or a girl? Is a trans girl a real girl?  I would be more interested in knowing how he defines hate?  Nevertheless, maybe he struggled with how he saw himself so he became an assassin. 

Why the Misreading Matters

• Clarity of communication – When identity is automatically read  or heard as trans, speakers who mean 'personal struggles,'  'cultural background,' or 'professional role' risk being misunderstood.
• Polarization – The shortcut can turn a neutral statement into a flashpoint, especially in comment sections where nuance is scarce.
• Erasure of other identities – Reducing the term to one facet marginalizes the many ways people experience and define themselves.

It's Anecdotal but... 

Nobody in the whole wide world thought identity meant trans thirty years ago. Look how far we've come. Not only were trans not a threat when I was in high school, the concept didn't even exist in our psyche. We certainly didn't have furry.  An identity crisis didn't mean unsure about gender or sex or species .  Imagine that! 

I never saw any trans being bullied because I never knew it was a thing. Sure SNL made fun of people that were confused about Pat's gender, Pat didn't seem to mind. Sure Hollywood thought black men pretending to be women was funny, but the men didn't think they were women. Or a father pretending to be an old woman housekeeper to be with his kids after a divorce. (I think the point was "love will prevail" or something not "respect men that feel like old housekeepers"—Even if you catch them peeing standing up). Just didn't seem to be a big problem. 

 If I saw a man pretending to be a woman go into a female bathroom, I might worry he might be a threat. But they would probably be fine if they just never do anything creepy. If they use the toilet and leave no one would ever know. I promise you I have never once examined any dude in a bathroom and found them wanting, so to speak. Put a 1 in the comments if you have, The 1's are the ones I will hopefully avoid! 

My whole damn life, everyone seemed to know their own gender and everyone else seemed to believe them. Sure kids made fun of each other for their clothes or having unpopular hobbies.  Perhaps even about being stupid, smelly, short, ugly...Stuff like that. I don't remember a single time a kid was upset for being misgendered. Being misgendered was when a kid thought a guy was a girl because their hair was too long or something stereo-typically girl like or vice versa, Then they would apologize. 
It wasn't about calling out the fakes after them demanding we respect that they tell us they are fakes all the time. 

 As far as I actually know 90% of every kid I actually knew were actually the opposite sex from what I thought they were, They must have been good at pretending. We didn't have a word like trans — so we would know that it is fake while having to pretend it is real.  
 We also didn't have men in girl sports because we didn't have girl sports. We had girls in sports, and they sucked, but we put up with it.  They didn't seem to know they sucked, or they were having fun and didn't care. No I am just kidding there was softball­ —boys didn't play that.

The Day I Stopped Mistaking Confusion for Connection

When Reconnection Feels More Like a Riddle Than a Reunion

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“Walk a mile in another one’s shoes… or pretend to on ChatGPT.”

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Straight Pride- Straight Up Satire

A Straight Pride Parade held in Boston on August 31st, 2019 by an promotion calling itself Super Happy Fun America sparked controversy and protests. The most semi-coherent and widely spouted argument against the event is that straight people are not marginalized or oppressed so they "do not need a parade". I do not know when it became necessary to be oppressed to celebrate anything or have a parade. I know very little about the promotion or what is really in the founders hearts and minds but I would easily concede it could meet the definition of a "troll" event, in the online vernacular. More importantly and to the point though, it is clearly satirical.

Satire- trenchant wit, irony or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly. (Merriam-Webster)

One may argue it is mean to make light of the struggle certain people have experienced for being abnormal, which is a completely reasonable response. However, I think the "folly" this event exposes is the completely unreasonable response it actually receives.  First we have a president of a college, Lee Pelton, Calling it "a perversion". Is the irony lost?  What is it "perverting"?  The meaning and purpose of a parade?  Free Speech?  Clearly it is not perverting the design and purpose for sex.  In order to argue against people celebrating something so mundane in fact, people seem to have to impute the motive of hate to everyone involved.  I saw several live-streams where protestors take to calling everyone there for the parade a "Nazi", even people just there to report.  Then they start chanting, "Hate speech is not free speech", and "Boston hates you." All this in the name of "tolerance and diversity".    There is no shortage of clear examples of this complete and utter "folly" in America and the rest of the world today.  Speech is Speech .  Expression is Expression. There is good reason these should remain free.

My Boss Called ME Fat!

He’s not actually my “boss” per se, he is the owner of the company I work for and I rarely ever see him.  And truth be told, he did not really just call me fat.  He asked me if I was putting on weight.  He said I looked forty pounds heavier then the last time he saw me.  He told me I was too young to be putting on that kind of weight, and that it was not good.  He asked me what is going on.  He did not care if I was offended, he may have even been genuinely concerned for me but it was blunt and matter of fact.
I, of course knew already, I needed to make a change.  The year before I made a new years resolution to not buy anything out of the vending machines at work for a year.  Before that I was buying at least a twenty once soda every day.  I had made that goal but I would still go out to eat and binge on sweet carbonated beverages at least two or three days a week.  Just after the new year, exercise and diet came up in a sermon.  The speaker specifically hit on how he had to give up pop.  I was already feeling bad because I could not physically keep up with my nephew at all anymore.  I was also embarrassed that I drank more pop then the kids.  The weekend before this conversation I joined a site called exercise friends, I also had a dream in which I was ashamed and lying about how much more I was eating then everyone else.  But this was the final straw.  I bought a scale went on a calorie restrictive diet, quit drinking pop, and started exercising every day.  I do not really consider this particular incident love but as much as I hate to admit it, his blunt question and comment was ultimately helpful to me.

A Lesson in Brutal Honesty From the World of MMA

Another one for the “tough love” category for sure.  The above video is a sensationalized edited* version of a conversation that took place at Joe Rogan’s studio for  The Fighter and the Kid podcast.  In essence it is Joe telling his friend Brendan Schaub, a mixed martial artist in the UFC heavy-weight division, that he does not think he should keep fighting.  He tells him he is not good enough to become a champion and the risk is no longer worth it.  This was recorded two days after Brendan’s loss to Travis Browne at UFC 181.  The reason I re-post it here is not really to speak to the point of whether or not Joe’s specific points are correct but because it is an example of someone speaking a hard message to a friend out of love.  A lot of people criticize not that Joe spoke his heart so to speak, but that he did it in a public setting.  In a follow-up recording about how he felt about delivering such a message to his friend, Joe Rogan actually said he would probably agree.   (Joe Rogan explains Brendan Schaub comments)  Brendan also talks in a follow-up recording about what was going on with him while this was happening and immediately following.  (Brendan Schaub responds to Joe Rogan) He deserves respect for listening to what Rogan had to say whether he takes the advise or not.  Since this was streamed live as it was being recorded he was receiving advise via texts from friends and family to not take it and to leave.  It shows a great deal of emotional intelligence for him to be willing to sit through what would feel like a brutal beating of a different kind. 
I believe we all need friends willing to do this but we most often avoid it.  What experiences have you had in either receiving or giving a brutally honest message to someone you love?
*Click here for the Full Version of the Podcast

“IT’S NO BIG DEAL!” (How to Comfort Part 3)

A Christian college student meets a fellow student that is obviously in some sort of distress and wanting to talk about it.  In the course of being willing to lend an ear and provide comfort, she discovers the reason this girl is upset is because her boyfriend is, as she says, “being a jerk to me, just because I had a one night stand”.  Obviously not everyone agrees that a one night stand is “no big deal” as is implicit by such a protestation.  In trying to care, the Christian was put in the awkward situation of trying to comfort someone she disagrees with.  In order to comfort, if she says nothing about her own views of one night stands, she is automatically forced into a situation of having to agree with her.  If she states her own belief she runs the risk of being thought judgmental.  She could be very judgmental but disagreement does not prove this is the case.  The anguish this young woman was feeling was real regardless of whether or not she deserved the anguish because she brought it on her self.  How do you help someone in such a situation?  Of course there is not a simple answer for every case but I suggested perhaps it might be tactful to simply ask for permission to speak ones own mind.  If permission was granted she could say, “I believe your boyfriend has every right to be upset.  A one night stand with someone else clearly was a serious breach in your relationship.  Of course I am a Christian so I believe sex is part of a sacred union to be enjoyed within marriage.  Now is an excellent time to repent.”  Comforting?  Loving?  Offensive?  Is this the only way to go about it?  She could possibly ask penetrating questions, “Why do you believe a one night stand is no big deal?”  “Why shouldn’t your boyfriend be upset?”  “How do you feel when someone betrays your trust?”

In the course of trying to comfort someone, have you ever been put in the position of being expected to agree with something you fundamentally disagree with?  How did you handle it?  How should you have handled it (if you wish you handled it differently)?

“Curse GOD and DIE”

I listened as someone voiced their frustration and disappointment regarding God and their relationship with God.  Questioning both the existence of God and especially God’s care for them.  They mentioned they do not see eye to eye with God and expressed their anger at God.  They indicated how hard they have tried to seek God through prayer and reading the Bible and doing “everything right” and yet God is silent.  They are not happy with their situation and God does not seem available to help or give them a new or better situation.

Another person agreed and said how they cuss God out.  “People say it’s wrong”, he said, “but I do it anyway.”  Most everyone else was there to quickly lend support.  “It’s okay, God can take it”, I heard one man say.  “Think about David, and the Psalms, he complained to God.”  The question I’m asking, is not whether or not “God can take it” the question is, how should we respond? 

This is part of the topic and the question I raised in my previous post, “How To Comfort?”  The struggle is real, the questions or doubts are real, and the pain is real.  However, I am uncomfortable with the notion that we can and should talk to God how ever we want.  Sure, God will have mercy on whom he will have mercy.  (Exodus 33:19)  Yet I still question if that kind of advise should be given?

It reminds me of the advise Job’s wife gave, “Curse God and Die” and the story of Job in general. In the context of the story she was literally telling him to give up.  The original challenge Satan gave was, “Does Job fear God for nothing?”.  Satan’s challenge was that if he was allowed to afflict Job, first by taking away his children and his possessions and then by taking his health, Job would curse God to his face.  (Job 1:11; 2:5)  Some make the assertion that Job’s wife was encouraging suicide, which may be true, but in the context of the story the important part was what Job did and did not say.

But he said to her, "You speak as one of the foolish women speaks. Shall we indeed accept good from God and not accept adversity?" In all this Job did not sin with his lips.

When Job’s three friends came along, the best thing they did in the bulk of the story was mourn and sit with him for seven days and seven nights without saying anything to him.  (Job 2:13)  I have heard that was a cultural sign of respect to not speak to Job until after Job had spoken to them to in effect ask for comfort.  Such a custom would not guarantee a correct response, as is evident in the story, but it would prevent a hasty response.  The rest of the book of Job, and the Bible for that matter, gives a great deal of importance to the words spoken.  Particularly when we put ourselves in the position of having the answer, or purporting to speak for God. 

I therefore contend that the Bible would clearly admonish us to take heed, be careful of the words we use in trying to comfort others and in how we speak to, and about God.

For More on Job and the Phrase "Curse God and Die"

Curse God and Die [Archive] — Rev. Ed Hird, Rector, St. Simon’s Anglican Church
Homily: Curse God and Die — Mark Rainey
Job's Wife - Bitter, Angry, and Wrong [Archive]

HOW TO COMFORT?

This topic has been somewhat on the back burner. When I started, Offend Me With Your Love, I was thinking about what it means to show love. Undoubtedly, I had in mind the ridiculous politically correct nonsense about everyone having a right not to be offended. Clearly, the goal is not to be offensive for the sake of being offensive. The goal is in some sense to take back what it really means to love from the narrow explanations. Of course, the inverse is true as well. What really constitutes hate? Both these terms either are applied too loosely or are too narrowly defined. The false, logically inconsistent, message says, “If it agrees with me or sounds nice it is love, if it disagrees with me or sounds harsh it is hate.”
Of course, Offend Me With Your Love came out of a much more personal place as well. I was going through the darkest time of my life and realized nobody loved me, at least not in a way I could really understand. I had an overwhelming desire to cut everyone out of my life and literally disappear myself permanently. The very few people in my life that cared about me would not say anything because they were afraid of offending me. This only reinforced the belief and the message, “go quietly; nobody cares.”
Who am I to say if they did the right thing or not? I am still here. I doubt ignoring a problem in the hopes that it goes away is a good general rule to live by. It may absolutely be the right answer to say nothing at times. I know I am a sinner and especially need tough love sometimes, although that is obviously not the answer in every situation either.  Paul writes,

“Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4, KJV).

The word Trouble is θλῖψις (Transliteration: thlipsis) from <G2346> (thlibo); pressure (literal or figurative) :- afflicted (-tion), anguish, burdened, persecution, tribulation, trouble.¹
There is So Much Trouble in the World. It would be great to know how to give comfort. Yet we have to be honest with ourselves as believers in Y’shua *(JESUS). When non-believers look at the church and its message, they are confused. We meddle in the affairs of others outside the church without really setting our own household in order. Obviously, we should start at the household of God. How are we to comfort each other?
In upcoming posts, I will talk about some specific situations and questions I have come to in my everyday life and through reading other’s blogs. In the meantime, check out the very interesting site Net-burst.Net [current] [Archive] for many articles of encouragement on a wide range of topics.

1 James Strong, Strong's Talking Greek & Hebrew Dictionary, (Austin, TX: WORDsearch Corp., 2007), WORDsearch CROSS e-book, Under: "2347".

Smoke and Mirrors —Religious Pretending Has No Place Amongst Saints

I have been following this blog —The Sexy Celibate: Making Sense of the Unexpected Single Life.  In this post -Why it Sucks to be Unintentionally Overlooked Part III (In Which Cinderella Wears a Power Suit),* the question was raised, why “Happily ever after” has to always be found in marriage?  This is from the perspective of someone that still longs to be married but the story has yet to turn out that way.  Adding to the pain is the prevalent notion that happiness can not be found in other ways.  Or the pain of being overlooked or undervalued (especially in church) because ones story does not represent the acceptable narrative.

My personal favorite Disney cartoon was Beauty and the Beast. Originally it was because I thought the songs were funny and the scenes in the Beast’s castle really tripped me out when I used and abused psychoactive chemicals.   Unfortunately, I can relate with the Beast; he was hopeless.  He was ugly because he treated people badly.  Belle was praised for her beauty yet ostracized in her community for being "strange".  Yet she was kind.  Of course, she wanted more out of life then she was experiencing and was intrigued by tales of adventure and the notion of "meeting prince Charming".  Instead of ending in marriage could it have ended with the Beast going to rehab and Belle pursuing inventing things with a generous grant from the guy formally known as the Beast?  I don't want to take Disney analogies too far because typically there are false messages included as well.  (I haven't seen it in awhile but an example that comes immediately to mind is that it is inadvisable for nice women to try to "save" total jerks through "dating".¹   I did a Startpage search for, "what is the main message of Beauty and the Beast" and the first answer I read was, "Treat others the way you would want to be treated". That is a good place to start. Of course, easier said then done!  Especially, when one is so depressed they wished they never woke up today.  This calls our usefulness into question which can further our despair.  Otherwise our wounded-ness can lead to bitterness and any number of beastly behaviors. 

Often our experience of church sadly is as a place of smoke and mirrors.  Even in small "Bible studies" people seemingly have to protect themselves and therefore speak so vaguely about things that what they are saying ends up meaning very little.   As Sam Cox so eloquently put it in the comments for the Beauty and the Beast on youtube, "that great contradiction in all of us - we want to be seen, heard and understood for who we are on the inside and yet that very person is the same person who would misjudge others in the first place.”  The church should be as Ted Roberts puts it, “a  place of practical grace… a place where hope is the dominant theme, and denial, especially religious pretending, is nowhere in sight.”  In the church, amongst Christians, we should feel safe to bring all of our emotions to the light.  Jesus himself was the one whom Isaiah prophesied as, “a man of sorrows acquainted with grief”.  (Isaiah 53:3)   I think of the saying “the church is not a museum for saints but a hospital for sinners”.   I get the gist, although it hits me the wrong way because it perpetuates a false notion of what a saint truly is, Biblically speaking. 

 

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*(this post has since been removed so it is a little unclear why i am still talking about it)

^{1. [7 Classic Disney Movies That Taught Us Terrible Lessons}

4 Beauty and the Beast: Just Because He's Abusive, Doesn't Mean He's Not a Really Good Guy

] ↩
A funny example of over thinking Disney films— Beauty and the Beast’s Dark Delusion

Both Sides of the Coin –The Problem of Believing in Miracles

I stumbled across this video today - Jesus Culture: Mickey Mouse Miracles are no Miracles at all- (beginning at 15:43).  The first part of the video I did not find particularly special, however I did have a deep emotional response to the Will Gray Video.  I mourn along with Angie, Will’s widow, and feel a tremendous amount of empathy for the pain she has experienced.   In case it is not apparent from the title of the video, Bezel333 is contrasting the sickness and subsequent death of Will Gray with the inconsequential miracles of healing allegedly coming out of Jesus Culture.

As far as miracles and the supernatural are concerned I always wonder about Jesus’ apparent lack of patience in the story of the demon-possessed child when he was told his disciples failed to cast out the demon. (Matthew 17:16-17; Mark 9:18; Luke 9:40)  Is Jesus really frustrated because his disciples could not cast out a demon?  I hope to understand exactly what is going on here.  One point Jesus makes and is particularly highlighted in Luke’s account is about how he would soon be betrayed.  (Luke 9:43,44)  Yet in the other two accounts the disciples ask him privately why they could not cast it out.  They are told it is because of their unbelief in Matthew’s account in addition to the need for prayer and or fasting also mentioned in Marks account. (Matthew 17:20,21; Mark 9:28,29)

Elsewhere Bezel333 mentions how the miracles are inconsequential compared to the ones we read about in the New Testament Scriptures.  However, to be fair most of the healings Jesus and his disciples performed were inconsequential to the writers of the New Testament Gospels.  By this I mean very few were actually detailed, the rest were mentioned only in passing. 

That being said, I sympathize with the overall point Bezel333 is making.  I have had contact with people associated with Bethel's School of Supernatural Ministry and International House of Prayer.  I have personally been troubled in the presence of “glory-tunnels”, guided visions, uncontrolled laughter for no apparent reason, and inconsequential so-called miracles of healing.   In fact this reminded me of a book review I wrote in 2011 related to this topic. 

Free-Falling by Chuck Parry
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

An Interesting read. Some incredible stories to ponder! Free-Falling is painfully optimistic. Surely in keeping with an intended purpose for the book, to highlight the miraculous wonderful aspects of a life lived following Jesus, Chuck seems to have it so easy. It is as if Chuck is always in the right place at the right time. Painful for someone such as myself that rarely experiences this. Feeling as if I'm usually at the wrong place at the wrong time and things don't seem to work out well. I believe in the miraculous and I want to have a real faith that God is in charge and believe for Him to come through and be magnified. However, there is also a lot to be said for the struggles, the hurts or pains, disappointments, tribulation, and persecution of a life lived following Jesus. Being able to bear it without giving up or completely losing heart is ever bit as miraculous as the "good" experiences we encounter. I think me not having a firm grasp on both sides of the coin has caused me to lose heart many times which in turn caused me to backslide or try to satisfy myself outside of God's will. Therefore, I am jealous that my story doesn't read as a continual tale from glory to glory to glory.

That being said, I was present for many of the events detailed in Free-Falling, regarding the Rainbow Gathering. I can attest to witnessing several of the events described. My take on a couple of these events was very different, however. Particularly, the 2009 New Mexico gathering (pg 185-189). I was there for the worship circle and saw John after he was healed. I was even there when someone else videotaped him testifying about the healing. (I asked them to send me a copy but they never did). All that seemed really awesome however I was deeply troubled in my spirit with the events involving Jason. I was impressed by his personality, I believe he is one of those "prophetic ministry type" coming out of Kansas City perhaps. Nevertheless, I felt a deep troubling unrest when he led a "guided vision" tour of heaven (pg 189) Of course it was one of those times that I wondered what was wrong with me since all these other Christians there were on board with this. However, I have since found out that I am not alone in this. It is seen by other Christians as not a legitimate Christian practice and is instead regarded as straight from esoteric (occult) or "New Age" practices. The other thing that really bothered me was Jason's "leg lengthening" practice. This had all the appearance and reality of a cheap parlor trick. The way Jason held the legs, it was an optical illusion. I don't know why the Living God would resort to such ridiculous manifestations.

View all my reviews

"Personality Disorder"

When I presented my step one on 4-2-2013, the one criticism (if I could call it that) I received, was in my using the term “Personality Disorder”.  A guy took exception, and told me that he was tracking with me until I referred to my “personality disorder”.  It actually was in the form of a compliment because he was basically saying someone with a personality disorder would not have the kind of clarity or perspective into oneself that I was evidencing by my summary.  When he first raised the question about my use of the term I asked if “personality disorder” was a technical term I was not allowed to use.  I told him I did not mean it in a technical sense.  I had never looked into “personality disorders” in the technical sense.  I have been fond of taking all sorts of assessments for personality “type indicators” which generally put personality differences in a positive light so to speak.  If there is any criticism or negative aspects of a personality it is sandwiched between all the compliments and usually takes the form of “if you want to be different” type advise on how to improve some of ones weaknesses.  While I was working step five I wrote a counseling center and was trying to ask a generic question about how they conduct the psychological intake in dealing with a condition they call “Intimacy Anorexia” because they are dealing in a field of “treatment” for a “disorder” that is not widely accepted and therefore isn't included in the DSM-5.  To formulate my question I gave a brief summary of myself.  What was interesting and somewhat confusing was the response she gave did not answer the question I was asking,  Instead of telling me how they go about diagnosing Intimacy Anorexia, she suggested based off very limited information about me, that perhaps I had Schizoid Personality Disorder.  This got me wondering why the disparity.  How could one person with basically the same limited information about me, so readily say I could not have a personality disorder and another so easily give me a diagnosis of sorts of a personality disorder.  So I found this self test online.  Of course it is a free self test found online, so like every other assessment I have ever taken, I do not know that it proves anything.*  Nevertheless it is kind of fun.  Take it yourself, if you dare.  And as always feel free to leave me a comment.

My results:

Disorder Rating Paranoid Personality Disorder: Moderate Schizoid Personality Disorder: Moderate Schizotypal Personality Disorder: High Antisocial Personality Disorder: Moderate Borderline Personality Disorder: Moderate Histrionic Personality Disorder: Low Narcissistic Personality Disorder: Moderate Avoidant Personality Disorder: High Dependent Personality Disorder: High Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder: High -- Take the Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Info -- (*and of course comes with the disclaimer that only a trained professional can actually diagnose a personality disorder.)